Southern
Appalachian Social Life
The
Valentines moved into the Cocke County area of the Smoky Mountains
about 200 years ago. Specifically,
they moved into the Cosby/Jones Cove area.
Durin' the 1930s, my mother's father took a job as a field foreman on a
nursery which was located at Reagan's Station-about 100 miles away. He moved his family there when mom was a teenager.
Shortly
after
I was born, Mom moved to Knoxville and that's where I went to school. I have only lived full time in this area since I married
Dorey on December 18, 1983. Durin' that time I have learned quite a bit more about these mountain folks.
For
example, very few of them seem to have the word 'afternoon' in their spoken language.
Instead they use "evenin' "fur anytime between noon and midnight.
Which can cause considerable dadblame confusion especially when they are
communicatin' with folks that do use 'atternoon.' I
highly recommend that you pin them down to a specific time of the evenin'.
If they see a dove, they call it a dove. But if they just hear a dove in the woods, but don't see him, they call it a 'Rain Crow.' What the hell, "coo coo coo" has to do with rain is one of them thangs I ain't figured out yet. Mama Ponder still swears there is a difference tho she reckons as how she ain't never in her born days actually seen a rain dove, but according to local folklore, rain crows will bring rain.
There
is very little social life in these mountain communities as most big city folk
think of such. Attendin' church and funeral services are the two most
frequent social functions I can think of off hand. I have
always limited my funeral attendance to payin' my respects only to a deceased
person that I knew personally and respected and that's what I still do.
But
The
entire community comes together fur a traumatic illness or injury or a tragic
loss of property-say due to fire or an accident. They
usually hold an auction in the local grammar school gym with the proceeds going
to the family in need. This is
They
do the same thang every year fur their church and when they need some extra
funds. They call the annual sale,
"The Lord's Acre Sale." The church members sneak up here to Mama and
Dorey and make a deal a week before the auction to buy all of the apple butter
they fix right then and there before they even take it to the auction.
Apparently, this is not considered a sin even though the apple butter
would have brought more money at the auction.
It's
true that funeral and church services account fur most of the rural mountain
social life and the auctions help take up the slack, but there's also one other
very important event which accounts fur most of the remainin' social life and
that is shoppin'. If you are a
member of the middle or upper hillbilly class, it is imperative that you wear
your best go-to-meetin' clothes when you go shoppin'¾even if you're only
goin' to the county seat, population
12,000, to get groceries at Food City or Ingles.
Thou shall not do as Old Val does and shuffle on downtown wearin'
whatever you happen to have on at the time.
Heaven forbid! A shower and
change into fresh clothes [which must pass muster] is the only way to avoid a
severe chastisin', unless of course you slip out while Mama Ponder is napin'.
Preparein' to go shopin' is as important as preparein' to attend church or
funeral services.
Except
fur
them services I already told you about, family reunions and doctor and dentist
appointments is about the only time Mama Ponder leaves this property. So shoppin' is somethin' to be taken very seriously and
proper preparation is required. And
everyone knows that it takes quite a while to get ready to go shoppin' because
it takes both Mama and Dorey to beg, threaten, and cajole Ole Val until he
finally meets with their complete approval¾well
almost anyway. And usually he just
barely meets their minimum standards which include a shower, shave, clean
pressed clothes, clean shoes, and fresh underwear¾in case of a car wreck [as if anyone would know the
condition of my underwear prior to said disaster].
Now, if there was just some way to replace that damn frown on his ugly
face with a smile to help win over the butcher...
Ever
now and agin back in these hills, you'll meet up with an old person of Scotch-Irish
decent that still speaks basically old English and you have to listen real
careful-like if you want to understand them and you will too because you do want
to understand them.
To me, hearin' them talk is like listenin' to music and I enjoy hearin' them talk even if they're just
discussin' ever day thangs.
Not many of them folks left around here nowadays.
Oh by the way, askin' fer directions from some of these people is the best way to get lost I can think of. I can not recommend it. You might get lucky and get one that has spent some time in the military and knows how to give accurate clear directions, but most likely you won't and you will be more confused than you were before you asked. The real problem is you just might not know you’re confused.
Don "Brer Bear" Valentine
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