HONKYTONKS
The night life hereabouts is mostly eatin' out, goin' to honkytonks [or 'joints' as Mama Ponder calls 'em], and maybe if you're ah mind to it, goin' to dog fights or rooster fights. I sometimes participate in the first event, but never in tuthers. I think we got ourselves more dadblame restaurants than anythang else except homes in this county. I don't understand how so many eatin' places can make a profit in such a small community. Except for two places, I don't reckon there's a joint in this county that ain't had somebody murdered in it or in its parkin' lot, many have had multiple murders on the premises. Several have had from three to six people kilt there in just one night. Many of the joints are just ashes and memories because they made enemies and their enemies burnt 'em out one dark night. I would say about two-thirds were burnt down. I think them joints that had the largest number of killin's were all torched. Joints in this part of the mountains is where the trouble makers go to plot their next evil deed, celebrate their last evil deed, see how drunk they can get and how much hell they can raise in one night. They are not like your friendly neighborhood tavern up north. Now down in Knoxville they have some friendly taverns like that.
The sheriff's boys raid our joints ever now and agin, just to make a show at keepin' the peace I think. I recall one raid where they confiscated illegal booze, drugs, and guns. After they finished tallyin' up the guns they found they had an average of two guns for ever man and woman in the place, includin' the bartender and owner.
There are only a couple of decent places where you can get a beer or some booze with a meal in this county: the Grease Rack, maybe the golf course [not sure about that - I don't commit golf], and the Fox & Hounds. Oh yes, strangers are not appreciated one lil' bit in the local joints, so try to remember to not stop in any tavern in Cocke County Tennessee if you ever pass through here.
Don "Brer Bear" Valentine
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